Last Christmas you might have noticed no one under 20 talked about Christmas any more, just Xmas, so I suppose we Harlequins ought to accept the paradigm shift and refer to the X-Man instead of Santa! As Xmas 2018 is rushing towards us it is high time to get down to Christmas, sorry, Xmas preparation Sprint Planning, and to post a few pre-Xmas tweets. A few likes on Facebook for our favourite Christmas songs will put us in the right Xmas groove and optimise our click level.
The beginning – Xmas Kick-Off
The kick-off meeting for the first sprint (aka first Sunday of Advent) was already held at the end of November. As a result the first come-together of the SCRUM teams which was facilitated by the Xmas Product Owner and one of X Man’s elves as SCRUM Master, had to be held via video link.
Then we moved an agile kick-off to an earlier slot in which we discuss the roles, objectives and ideas for presents discussed and determined in workshops. In this way we shall establish clear roles and responsibilities, a Christmassy performance and optimised present allocations.
Santa Claus/X-Man as the Xmas Product Owner will in future consist of max. 4 weekly sprints, and is planning a PMI certification for agile Xmas Planning. An essential element of this will be regular visits to the Christmas Market (Xmas Stand-Up) to review user stories and groom the backlog/hangover.
Xmas Stand-Up – optionally without alcohol
These meetings will also serve to keep team performance at an optimum level, as well as secure the vulnerable interfaces with the local mulled wine producers. With an eye to globalisation the Christmas Market will also be accessible via the Internet as virtual reality. The accompanying imbibing of virtual mulled wine and virtual Xmas cookies is low in calories and has no impact on your driving abilities. In this way valued partners – virtual service providers (angels, elves and reindeer) will at last be integrated. A whole bundle of incentives and change agent-led team-building events in various virtual locations have been designed to enhance motivation levels and simultaneously help to foster the Christian Corporate Culture within the Xmas Identity.
The proposal to allocate a personal coach to each angel has been provisionally shelved due to budgetary considerations. Instead it was proposed on a Kanban-Board that we should set up a pilot project for an Xmas Facebook account for spontaneous Christmas wishes – a complementary Twitter channel is also in planning.
MIST helps gift planning
Our sophisticated Management Information System (MIST) has enabled benchmark-oriented best-of-breed controlling for gift planning. A burn-down chart consisting of advent wreath and calendar serves to visualise performance data with completed and outstanding work.
Regularly changing chocolate deliverables in addition serve as giveaways and accompanying marketing initiatives. We reached a surprising consensus in the WhatsApp group on our new Mission Statement: “Driving Home for Xmas” will replace the previous”Merry Christmas”. In view of the threat of diesel bans in towns a courageous move.
X-Man (formerly known as Father Christmas) originally had doubts about the historical Corporate Design. After intensive review of corporate learnings (Xmas hit lists of the last 20 years) he finally accepted this loyal step and thus acknowledged the impressive creativity of his elves and harlequins.